Associating myself with Jayson over these past few years has only given me more problems than happiness.

This isn't good nor is it healthy, and I don't know if that happiness can ever outweigh the problems. I have so much more to say, but I never know where to start.

40 Days and 40 Nights

Today, March 5, marks the beginning of Lent.

During Lent, we are not to "consume" flesh.... which actually means we are not to consume human flesh. This is commonly mistaken for not consuming meat produce.

We must abstain from sexual activity. So for the next 40 days, not only will I refrain from actual sex, but I will refrain from all forms of sexual activity.

I learned of the true meaning of "not consuming flesh" last year, yet I still committed the sin - multiple times. Needless to say, the following month I got a yeast infection that lasted the remainder of the year (or until I decided to stop having sex with my partner.) Now I don't know if my yeast infection has gone away, or if it may come back another time... but I believe I have been given another chance to redeem myself. This year, I will not fail Him.

Lord help me, 'cuz temptation often gets the best of us. But if my partner truly respects me and loves Him, then this shall be no problem.